Healthy Living, Cancer, Scentsy, Grandma, Garages, Birthdays, Sports, Games and Diapers

I don't know how things are going for you, but life here seems busier than ever.

The other day I was thinking about how much I miss all of you. Thoughts of what to tell you run through my mind, but making time to sit down and share them has not been an option until today.

So, get your cup of coffee, find a comfy spot on the couch and let's catch up.

If you follow me on facebook at all, you may have seen that I recently started selling Scentsy. For those of you that have no clue what Scentsy is, it is a home fragrance line. We have everything from wax warmers to dish soap. In Septemberish of last year I had attended a party and learned of Scentsy. I had been using some plug-ins to make my house smell good for a while and was getting frustrated because the one scent that I liked, I could only find at Kroger occasionally. So, when I found several fragrances from Scentsy, I had to switch! In February, I decided to join the Scentsy team. It's been super fun so far. I have been extremely happy with the products as well as the customer support. Here is my website if you want to check it out.

Join me!

Through Scentsy, I found my healthy living motivation. Pretty much since August I have struggled once again with eating right and being active. Laziness is definitely a sin issue for me that I know the Lord is constantly chiseling away at. Molding and growing. In January, along with everyone else in the world, I made resolutions to get back at it and have failed miserably off and on since then. At the beginning of March, I received an email about Scentsy's Health Challenge and I knew I had to sign-up to participate. It started this week and I am dying. Haha. The hardest part is drinking 64 ounces of water every day. Before this week, I drank coffee and about 0 ounces of water. Yikes! So with 4 days in, I am feeling more motivated and that is such a great feeling. Onward! Oh and I signed up for my first race of the year which is in June. :)

Adam's game is officially in game stores. It's be so great to see him light up when sharing his game with others and hearing about people playing it. I still cannot beat him in a two-player game and when I do I will never play two-player again. Ha. You can check out more info here if you would like.

Other things going on here. Adam's sweet grandma has been in rehab so the girls and I have made efforts to see her every other week. It is such a delightful visit. The girls talk her ears off and it's even more so now that Charlotte has joined in.

Homeschooling has been going well for the most part. Kaylee is reading non-stop and loving it which makes me super excited! We have the occasional melt-down which can make some days hard. Overall though, I would say this year has gone well.

Kaylee just finished up her first season of basketball. It was awesome to see her make progress and to cheer her team on. I loved it and so did she. I am looking forward to her playing again.

Her ball goes in here. :)

Elanor just turned 5. She had a Barbie fashion party. My sister-in-law's, Grace and Kati, helped me give the girls makeovers and then they put dress-up clothes on and walked the runway. It was so cute! I think fun was had by all.

Charlotte has been spending a lot of her time running around naked lately. She may be ready to be potty trained, but I am not. Mainly because it requires being home for several days in a row and I just don't have that right now. Maybe once co-op is done. I am also not sure if I am ready for her to officially be out of the baby stage. It's hard to say that that phase in my life is done. I'll get there. Until then duct tape is the only way to keep her diaper on at bed time. There has been a time or two that even that didn't work.

Doesn't this look fun?

My momma has been having a rough go at things. The medications have all been messing with her leaving her weak and making it impossible for her to get around. I know a lot of you have been praying for her. Thank you for that. I get to go visit and help after her next chemo treatment which is this Thursday. Even though it is not a vacation visit of sorts, I am looking forward to being able to hug her and my dad. I hate living states away and not being able to help more often. Adam, friends, and family will have the girls while I am away. Please pray that my girls will be so good for everyone watching them. Thanks to all for helping.

Our garage. We were finally having one put on. It is so close to being done. It's been hard to park with all the construction going on, but I am excited to be able to park inside again. Especially on rainy days like today.

Beginning stages.

Softball for the girls and for Adam starts soon. In the meantime, I am enjoying the brief break from sports.

That catches you up on things here for the most part. How have you been? Anything new? I am so behind on everyone else's life. So, tell me. How are things? I hope you are doing well.

God Used You

Recently Adam and I shared our stories with our church family. Adam posted our "script" over on his blog if you missed it and want to check it out. For the life of me, I could not decide whether I wanted to share about my miscarriage or not. It felt too raw. Even up until the morning of, I was trying to decide. I had written out what I was going to say. It didn't feel like enough. But in light of what we were talking about, it didn't seem right to add more.

So, maybe this is a better place to put down what I wish I could have said. What I wish could have been summed up in that tiny paragraph.

This past year has been a complete turn around for me.

I wrote a couple of very raw posts that never saw the light on facebook. I only made myself vulnerable to those that are my true followers. (Shout out to the 7 of you that I know are reading.) You can find those by searching by the "miscarriage" label if you are super curious. But the point of this post isn't about where I was as much as where I am now and the process that I went through to get here.

During the last 2 (almost 3! Wow!) years, I questioned everything I had ever been taught about God. Even His existence. I consider this my darkest time. My most alone time. I wanted very much for God to rescue me and make it all better. I didn't want to grieve. I didn't want to think about it. But that never happened. I was forced to face the fact that my baby was not going to have a breath here on earth and that God was the One that allowed this to happen. I had no desire to seek God out.

So He sought me. And He used you to do it.

It started right away.

I had a friend drop of a special gift and literally hug and cry with me. My birthday was 2 weeks after I lost the baby and several of my closest friends took time off to go away with me to celebrate. One friend brought me meals for my freezer and gave me books that helped her through her time of loss. (Seriously yall, I did not want to get up some days. Those meals were great!) Several friends were willing to let me talk through the most painful times and not once did they try to offer advice or pretend to know what I was going through. Several of you shared your stories with me to encourage me and let me know that I am not alone. One friend sent me a sweet ribbon in memory of my baby. Others have sent cards, texts, and emails to let me know that they haven't forgotten about my sweet baby.

During this time, I had a very special conversation that I really consider the place that my heart started to let down the wall I had put up with God.  I had asked someone special to me how to move forward. I felt so stuck. I wanted to cry and miss my baby, but I also wanted to have joy because of the new life that I was carrying at the time. And was it ok that I wanted to do both? And in the mean time, did God really love me? Me. Specifically. And how. I wanted to feel His love in a tangible way. At the time, I listened and gleaned the wisdom imparted to me. All while sobbing through my sandwich. (This whole conversation took place at lunch at a homeschool convention.) As I look back, I have no doubt that even that conversation was God telling me that He loved me which is ironic since that was one of the things I was asking about.

Another friend shared with me how she realized that her children are simply on loan to her from God. That He knows how much time that they have on this earth and while she doesn't know how long that is, she surrenders her children to Him. What an amazing testimony?!

One other way God spoke to me was through music. One of my closest friends had said to me that she thought music was going to bring me healing. I laughed at her at the time. But after that it seemed like I kept finding songs that held how I felt. Here are a few of the ones that helped me through that time.

The first one was Give Me Faith. I shared about that one here.

Shortly after that I found these two songs by Plumb. I Need You Now and I Want You Here.

Draw me Nearer by Meredith Andrews

My favorite one of all of them is What I Know by Tricia because I found it when I really had no doubt that if I hung on to what I know then I would one day feel His presence again.

God used you guys to draw me back to Him! I thank Him for all of you!

Today I was in a Bible study where I was reminded of how God wants a relationship with me. He desires a deep intimate relationship with me. And when I sat there and thought about how I wanted that with Him, I realized that my heart had changed. I'm not sure specifically when my heart changed. I definitely see times that I was trying to change. But today I know my heart is in a good place. I no longer feel angry or bitter. Or wounded. But at peace.

That's not to say I don't grieve my baby. My baby would have turned 2 in August. It makes me sad to think about missed days. Missed firsts. Missed lasts. Boo-boos to kiss. Fingers to count.

It is to say, though, that God has walked me through the dark valley and I am finally once again walking where I feel Him walking with me and know that He does love me and care for me. And I don't think I would be in this place if it wasn't for all of you. Thank you.

How It All Began

When Adam introduced himself to me at school, I thought he was handsome, but little did I know he would one day be my husband. 

Adam invited some friends and me to visit him my first summer at school. On the way out to Indiana I got super nervous about seeing him, but didn't really understand why because I wasn't even sure that I liked him more than a friend.

Over the course of my visit, Adam talked with me and asked me to pray about dating him. I had made the decision to be single all summer so that I could spend some time focused on myself and my relationship with God and I appreciated that he respected that decision.

Over the next few months, I worked through my own self insecurities and struggles while praying constantly about Adam. 

When school started back up in the fall Adam came to me with a necklace that he had made. This necklace was made of 3 cords and he explained that if we worked together with God that we could handle anything. He gave me the necklace and told me that if and when I wanted to date him I could simply wear the necklace and then he would know that I was ready. 

On September 2nd, after Adam's basketball practice was over, I put on the necklace. My best friend Meggan almost broke my neck when she helped me yank off my other necklace and put his necklace on.

Don't Say The "D" Word

10 years ago around this time Adam and I were finishing up our premarital counseling in preparation for our quickly approaching wedding.

So for the next 10 weeks, I am going to be sharing about the last 10 years.

Today I want to share about one of the most important pieces of marital advice we received. Our pastor and his wife that did our premarital counseling were great. They did their best to share not only from their own experience, but also share from the Bible and what God says about marriage.

What was this great piece of advice?

Don't say the "D" word.

Divorce.

When you fight.

When you are angry.

When you are hurt.

When you are at your wit's end.

When you are joking around.

Don't say it.

When I decided to marry Adam, I decided to marry him for as long as I live. I told him so. In front of about 200 of our closest family and friends. This commitment that I made to him and with him was also a commitment that I made to God. A covenant.

Our marriage is not perfect.

We fight. And things get heated.

We get on each other's nerves. And disagree.

But "divorce" has never been a part of our vocabulary.

Our 1st Anniversary

Back From Colorado

We just got back from the longest drive we have ever taken our girls on. While Google says the trip to Pueblo should take about 17 hours, it took us more like 20.

On our way out, we stopped to visit with Adam's coach/dean of men from Vennard. Adam and I always enjoyed he and his wife's company when we were at school and since we were passing through there town, we called them up. It was such a great little visit.

We finally made it to Michael and Rachel's just in time to see Michael at his store and then go back to their house to put the girls to bed for the night. Then, Michael and I went over to church and practiced for Sunday.

The week flew by as each day had something fun.

We hung out with Rachel's family. (The girls made a craft with Rachel and her mom, June.)

We had Christmas together. 

We toured Pueblo.

We visited Focus on the Family's Whit's End and Adventures in Odyssey exhibit.

We drove through the garden of the gods.

We rode the cog-rail up to Pike's Peak. (Although, we couldn't go all the way to the top because the snow plow was broken and there was snow on the tracks.)

We met up with college friend's Derrick and Renee and their family for dinner. It was nice to catch up and hear what they are up to!

We picnic'd at Uplift Mountain and watched Adam do some of the obstacle course. (I was going to post the videos, but my phone is taking too long to upload them.)

We walked around Bishop's Castle.

We relaxed. 

We took some fun pictures.

It was a fun-filled week visiting with Michael and Rachel. 

On the way home, we stopped in Missouri and saw some more friends. We played some Cash and Guns and talked about life. (This seriously was one turn. Do you see how many guns were pointed at me?)

We drove the last 6 hours and arrived home with plenty of time to unpack and do laundry. :)
It was great to get away, see family and friends, and be rejuvenated.

Friday

Friday. I love Friday.

Yesterday was a super fun one.

The day started with my 6am wake-up call. I spent time talking to God and then got busy working. Can't do that without my coffee.

Once 8 rolled around it was time to get the girls ready for the day and for gymnastics. (After a FaceTime call from my parents.)

The day wouldn't be complete if I didn't have to give Charlotte a complete wardrobe change right when we are supposed to be walking out the door.

Finally got everyone loaded into the car.

And to gymnastics.

After gymnastics, we ran to Wal-Mart to pick up some pictures I needed for Charlotte's scrapbook and then went home and ate lunch.

I vacuumed the carpets and then put the girls down for naps.

While they napped, I worked on Charlotte's book and folded laundry.

After naps, we had dinner with Annie, Jeremy, and Paige and then Annie and I ran to Wal-Mart to pick up a different picture that I had printed. (Yes, I went to two different Wal-Marts on the same day because I didn't realize that I was printing pictures at the wrong one until it was too late.) Once we were back, the girls were all put to bed and then we played Jeremy's pick of Takenoko and Adam's pick of Smash Up. (Picture is of Takenoko.)

When they left, I finished folding laundry and watched some Doctor Who. (Such a great show!)

What did you do yesterday?

May Mingle: Adam - Theology, Board Games, and Life

Adam is my final May Mingle guest. I met Adam in college and although I wasn't his biggest fan in the beginning, he obviously won me over because I said yes when he asked me to marry him. I love AND respect him and I am so grateful he did a guest blog for all of you.

You can find more from his blog here.

Theology, Board Games, and Life

When Krista asked me to do a guest blog, she wanted me to write about myself, but also write about my blog so others know what I normally write about. So what you are really going to get here is three blogs in one. Sorta like an example of the Trinity. BAM! Theology! So here is Theology, Board Games, and Life sneak peak on Joy in the Journey.

Theology

The most impactful philosophical decision you make is if you believe in absolute truth. You see this decision drives how you live your life, how you see your life, how you see the lives of others. I've been thinking a lot about this recently. With everything that is constantly in the news like homosexual marriages, abortion, Ukraine, wars or potential wars, slaughter in Sudan, human trafficking, legalizing marijuana, and a host of other topics.

Whether you see all these things as morally bad, just bad, or just fine or morally good is not what I want you to think about right now. What I want you to think about is WHY they are that. Why is human trafficking bad? Why is a homosexual relationship okay? The answer lies in what you think about absolute truth. You see if there is not an objective maker of truth, than your answer for what makes genocide wrong depends on who you ask. This means that the value of human life depends upon who you ask and what century you ask them in.

However, if we take the view of absolute truth then the answer is the same today for me as it is 200 years from now for you. The moral values do not change according to who wins a war, is in power currently in government, or makes the decisions in our world. You see, the problem with not adhering to absolute truth is that carrying the logic fully out it is okay to kill 2 year olds if you won’t want them or marry 12 year olds or subdue millions, just so long as it is culturally acceptable to do so.

So if we take this further, if truth is absolute, somehow it has to be made absolute by something outside human decision. That objective maker of truth, I believe, is Jesus Christ and he proclaims his unchanging nature and thus unchanging truth in Hebrews 13:8: Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever! This gets personal for me, because I then see that I’m not just some animal whose value wanes, that my kids and my wife, and those people I interact with on a regular basis have real value and don’t just have value because the current culture I live in say they do. This then challenges me to show their value to me.

Board Games

Whew! Writing about theology is taxing and thought provoking, which is probably why writing about board games happens more often on my blogs. It is just easier and less controversial and I have to worry less about saying the wrong thing. I’m going to stereotype right now and assume that most of the readers here are female and also mothers, since a lot of what Krista writes about has to do with those two demographics. So for board games, I’d like to say play them! Board games are such an excellent hobby to do with your family for many reasons, but I’ll try and break it down quickly.

1.       They are really quite cheap. I mean you can spend $40 on a cool hobby board game now, but compare that to going to a movie. If you take a family of four to a movie, then it is at least $32 (that is if you get $8 tickets) plus any refreshments you get for 2 hours of entertainment. With boarding though, you get to keep that entertainment and do it again and again and then you can even sell it later and recoup some of your money.

2.       It allows for family time without a screen. As a husband I really love it that my wife and my kids play games with me. We play them, have a great time (because they aren't the usual boring and non-thinking games of Monopoly and Life), while learning and stretching our minds.

3.       Not sure why I made this a list, but for number 3, I want to at least suggest some games to check out. Try out Takenoko, which is a game about a panda and a gardener.  Try out Ticket to Ride, which is a game about building trains across the USA. Try out King of Tokyo, which is a game about monsters attacking Tokyo. All of these are awesome games.

Life

There are a lot of things to write about life, but I think I don’t realize it until I write it. Most often when I post about life, it is about my family I've found or things we do together. I recently went to a convention for 4 days and that is when you realize what you miss in life, which is family. Just talking on FaceTime once a day isn't enough time to see them and only having the digital screen is not exactly cuddly. Life is the people you interact with whether going through tough times, missing them while you are away, or having a fun night playing board games or watching a movie. It was so great coming home from that convention, taking the next day off of work, and having the joy of my little girls run into the bedroom in the morning and climb up with kisses and hugs so excited to see me. That is life.

Oh. Yeah. I wanted to leave you with my favorite joke. What does a duck and tricycle have in common? They both have wheels…except for the duck!

Unglued

My best friend Meggan gave me a book called Unglued by Lysa TerKeurst probably 3 years ago. I am not certain of the time frame, but that is my guess. Honestly, I am not sure why I never read the book. Maybe I was little offended that she thought I needed the book? I started reading it at some point because I had a spot marked where I left off, but hadn't gotten very far. Blah, blah, blah. Haha. The point is that I am finally reading it.

So far, it has been super interesting. I am learning so much about myself and the way that I respond to others in situations. She has you take this little quiz to determine what kind of reaction type you are and with who. The who makes a difference in how you respond. So for me, when it comes to Adam, most family, and probably friends, I tend to internally process and internally suppress which makes me a stuffer that builds barriers. However, with my girls, I am the exact opposite. I externally process and externally express which makes me an exploder that blames others. With Adam, I tend to keep my frustrations to myself and with my girls I tend to get so frustrated that I explode. I yell. And I hate both reactions.

This book was/is definitely something I needed. (Good call, Meggan.)

One thing that I love about it so far is her thought of "imperfect progress" because when you are trying to change something about yourself it is difficult to see that you actually are changing. It's such a slow a grueling process and it is not perfect in any way. But at least it is progress.

Take her assessment online. It's not the same as the one in the book, but it gave me the same result.

What kind of reaction type are you and who do you react that way to?

Want to make imperfect progress? Read the book.

Lately

Our March was super crazy busy and awesome!

The month started out with Indy Con, our local gaming convention that Adam helps run. It is an invitation only 3 day board game convention limited to 150 people. 3 full days of board gaming with Adam without our girls so we get to game with each other.

The second weekend Adam went to a tournament with our friend Jeremy, and Jeremy's wife came over with their daughter Paige to hang out while they were gone. We spent the morning at Target. (of course I couldn't get a picture of all 3 of them looking.)

    

The third weekend was full of celebration. My parents came into town on Thursday and it was nice to have some time with them alone before all of the festivities. Friday, my Mema and Pepa came. I haven't seen them in person in 4 years! It was definitely wonderful to see them and hug their necks. Saturday we took them to Carmel and went to Bubs for lunch. It was a tad cold so we didn't spend as much time outside as we would have liked, but it was still a fun day. Sunday we had Charlotte's dedication at church, lunch afterwards, and then Elanor's birthday party that evening. Adam's family and my Uncle Dennis and his family came for the festivities along with a few friends that joined us for the dedication. It was such a fun busy day and I was exhausted by the end of it. The weekend as a whole was a blast. My cup was full and running over after the weekend ended.

The third weekend was our usual game day that we have every month. We have been averaging 20 people and this month did not disappoint. Annie, at one point, had all of the little girls on the couch with her.

The last weekend of the month I went to my very first home-school convention with my mother-in-law, Markita. It was a day packed with sessions and walking around the exhibit hall looking at curriculum. First off, I must admit, I enjoyed the sessions that I went to. They were incredible and insightful. They were both by Heidi St John, who is a tremendous speaker not only about home-schooling, but about being a momma in general. Looking forward to reading her book. I also had a marvelous time talking with Markita about life and about my handsome husband. It was really a great day.

April isn't as packed as March was, but I am really looking forward to what is on the calendar so far.

Titus

Today we are saying good-bye to Titus. In 2007 Adam and I moved to Indiana. After deciding to wait to get a house until 2008, we agreed on getting a cat to hopefully hold off my baby fever. I went online and found Titus on the humane society website. When we arrived I could not find him and I was extremely discouraged because I really wanted an orange short haired tabby. Adam suggested walking through and looking one last time and thankfully I found him. He was resting in the back of his cage which is why we had missed him the first time.

Titus has been a very good cat. He has had a few accidents over the years, but they all revolve around big changes such as moving and babies being born. It was never a huge problem though because we had hardwood floors so he would pee on something that we left on the floor, like a towel.


Titus loves the girls. It never ceases to amaze me the things that he lets Kaylee and Ella do to him, yet he still comes back for more. They run with him. They jump with him. They dance with him. They play chase and hide and seek. I know they will miss him.

He has seen me through some of my most difficult moments. From wanting a baby to finding out I was pregnant. From hating my job to finding out that I got a new one. From finding out my Momma had cancer to finding out that her surgery was a success. From losing the baby last year to finding out I was pregnant with Charlotte. From quiet times in the morning to playing with the girls in the loud moments of the day. These are times when he has climbed up into my lap and just let me cry or laugh. He has been a very good friend over the years.

Good-bye old friend.