30 Years

My best friend turned 30 over the weekend.

I think birthdays should be celebrated. Life is temporary here on earth. And short. So celebrate with those you love when you survive another year.

So, for Meggan's birthday, we had a kid-free weekend in Chicago with friends. It was extremely fun!

We started the weekend off with a birthday dessert at the Trump Terrace (Yes. Dessert before dinner.), which offered some of the most amazing views of Chicago.

After that, we went to dinner at Local 22. (The pic below is from the bathroom.) I had a chicken-wrap and oh man it was delicious. That plus my sweet potato fries made dinner amazing. We considered doing karaoke afterwards, but none of us were brave enough to be the first to go. Especially when we would have to follow this guy that had the crowd eating out of his hand. We talked about dancing after that, but didn't want to wait in the long line outside of Joe's.

Sunday was exciting as we toured downtown. We went to Millennium Park and checked-out cloud gate "the bean" first and then headed past the faces that spit water. Then, we thought it would be fun to walk 2.9 miles to Navy Pier. Needless to say, we were starving by the time we got there so we ate at Harry Caray's for lunch. Thankfully, we made it there and got a table before the rain brought in a huge crowd. After dinner we walked to the end of the pier and then took a free trolley and the L back to our car.

When we got back to the hotel, we played pool basketball against the Schwirtz's and lost to them by 1. And then after that game we played PIG and I beat them all. Which is pretty funny because I am the least athletic and have played that least amount of college basketball out of all of us. For dinner, we went to good ol' Chili's so we could eat 5 baskets of the bottomless chips and salsa plus our dinners.

The weekend was fantastic. Exhausting. And fun. I had such a good time that I was actually pretty sad to get home.

A quick shout-out to all the parents and family that watched all the kids so that we could have a weekend together. Especially to my parents who had to take on my baby girl which included lots of diaper changes plus two rambunctious little girls.

And to Meggan, may this year be truly remarkable and a thousand times more amazing than you ever dreamed it could be. Love you.

For Kree

Sorry for my absence, my dear readers.  So much has happened over the last couple of months that I got so behind with writing that instead of catching up, I have avoided it. I simply have not wanted to write because I knew what I needed to share was not going to be easy. But here I am. So let's catch up. Warning: This update is really hard to share and saddens my heart deeply. So, be prepared.

Two months ago, I received probably one of the worst calls of my life. My friend Sara called to tell me that my friend Grace's baby girl, who is just a little over a month younger than my Charlotte, had passed away in her sleep. My heart immediately broke. For Grace. For her family. For the life that little Kree will never live here on earth. And my arms ached to hold her one last time. To see her chubs. And to make her smile. I still can't grasp how quickly she came and how quickly she was gone.

Grace and I were both pretty pregnant when we met. It was nice to have someone so close to the same stage as me to complain to about the final pregnancy months and those uncomfortable parts and some of the awkward things. And also to celebrate with. Talking about names and ultrasounds. Hearing their heartbeats.

When it came time to have our girls, I was so worried that Grace would have Kree before I had Charlotte. And her due date was a month behind mine. But Grace said she always went early so I kept telling Charlotte that she better come out before Kree because she had plenty of time to do so. This time was different for Grace. Kree waited. She came on December 24th. (Charlotte was born on November 12th.)

After our girls were born, we now had more things to talk about. Their weight, their percentages, their sleeping and eating habits. Whether or not we were taking strollers on field trips. How they are growing and changing.

Kree was super strong. And I always felt like she was further along developmentally than Charlotte was. She was holding her head up strong and rolling over much better. Her belly time was long and she could sit pretty solid on laps.

At Kree's funeral, Grace shared all of the amazing things that Kree got to do in her short little life. The list was incredible. I bet some adults couldn't have said they had done all of the things that she had done.

But for me. The best thing Kree did while she was here, was start a great friendship.

If we hadn't both been pregnant, we might not have ended up in the nursery together. We might not have ever crossed paths.

I can't imagine the sadness that overwhelms my friend at times. Or fathom how empty she must feel when all she wants to do is hold Kree. Or grasp how hard it would be to grieve through that while the rest of the world doesn't stop moving forward with life.

My own tears come and go. As I remember this little girl that brought so much joy into the world. And as I think of the friend she brought into my life.

I will always consider her Charlotte's first little friend.

Kaylee's Kidbits and Ella's Endeavors

It has been over a year since I wrote one of my blogs on Kaylee and Ella. Can you believe it? Over a year!

They have changed so much!

Ella talks our heads off. Seriously. The child does not know what silence is. She doesn't even have to be talking to anyone in particular.

Kaylee loves to write. Even in places that she isn't supposed to write. Like the table. And the wall. But hey at least she is a pretty good artist.

Ella is a night owl. Loves to sneak up and play in her room. Sometimes I go to bed at 11 and her light is on and she is still up playing in her bed. She, like me, is not a morning person. She needs her space when she wakes up.

Kaylee is such a huge helper. She does a ton around the house to help now. She sweeps and puts away dishes. She folds all of the girl's laundry and then she puts it away. (Ella puts her own away as well.) She even makes breakfast and lunch for herself and Ella with a little help.

Ella helps too. Like I said, she puts away laundry. She also helps with silverware when unloading the dishwasher. She helps dust the furniture. Keeps her room clean.

Kaylee loves Legos, Barbies, and Jake and the Neverland Pirates. And all things Frozen. She is so imaginative and creative. I love watching her play.

Ella is a cuddle bear. She likes to sit on our laps and snuggle. She is so loving in that she constantly interrupts conversations and movies to say, "I wuv you, Mom." Makes my heart melt.

Kaylee has also become more affectionate. She gives hugs and cuddles and says I love you much more than she used to. She usually likes her space so I am really enjoying her recent change.

Ella loves dresses and accessories. She wears dresses everyday if possible.

Kaylee played t-ball in the spring and loved it. She seemed to get a little bored with being outfield, but loved to hit and run the bases.

Kaylee and Ella both love Charlotte. They dote on her all day every day. Sometimes it is overwhelming because they are always in her face. They help me with her. Kaylee will feed her her food and Ella will help feed her her bottle. It is so sweet to watch them with her though.

Both girls have grown up so much. My Kaylee will be 5 soon. I can't believe it. Until I talk to her and hear her grown up response. And I think, "when did you get so big?" 5 going on 15.

Top 10 Board Games (2 Player)

Adam likes to pick on me about being predictable when it comes to the boardgames that I pick for us to play. What can I say, I like what I like. Anyways, it got me thinking about those games so I decided to make a list.

My Top 10 Board Games (2 Player)

10. Carcassonne - This game is a tile-placement game where you are matching sides to create a French landscape in hopes to score the most points on your cloisters, cities, roads, or farms. Carcassonne is quick with 2 players. I prefer the basic game since I have found it difficult to keep my "sore loserness" in check when it is just Adam and I playing. The basic game can be mean, but not as mean as with the other expansions. I like this game because it is unique in the fact that you design the board as you go.




9. Ticket to Ride: Nordic Countries - In this game, you collect cards that correspond with the board to place out trains in order to complete routes on tickets that are hidden from others by connecting different cities. In all honesty, I like this game because Adam is great at most games, but this game is one that I most consistently beat him at. So aside from winning, I enjoy this game because of being able to complete routes secretly and see them come together on the board. And it is a really pretty game.

8. Castles of Burgundy - Castles is all about building your settlement in the order that will help you gain the most points overall. This game is also in my original top 10 games ever that I wrote last January. I like this game because I enjoy putting my settlement together and that you can win with lots of different strategies. Adam likes to ship a lot and I like to collect the different buildings.






7. Galaxy Trucker: Anniversary Edition - This game is fun and crazy. Everyone races to build their spaceship before the time runs out. Then, you face all sort of good things like goods to ship and bad things like space pirates that shoot at you and hope that your spaceship can survive the trip. I hated this game the first time I played it because I ended the game with 0 points. One of the expansions in the anniversary edition even adds negative points, but I was playing the base game the first time I played. After playing a few times, I learned how to build my ship better so it can withstand the torments that it faces, making me a little better at the game. I like this game because it is unique in it's game-play as well as it doesn't burn the brain like others can. All around just lots of fun.



6. Suburbia - In this game, you lay tiles in your own little city to make money in hopes of gaining a higher population than anyone else. Everyone also has their own secret goals that gain them extra population if they are completed by the end of the game. I like this game because of the interaction between the tiles you place in your city. For instance if you place a lake next to a tile, you get $2 for that tile. So, it really matters where you place your tiles.




5. Legacy: The Testament of Duke de Crecy - Legacy is about, well your legacy. You are marrying people off in hopes to have the most prestigious legacy. I like this game because I enjoy watching my family line come together. If you were to play this with more than 2 players, you better have a very large table to play on because the family trees take up quite a bit of space.





4. Le Havre - This game is all about gaining wealth. You want to purchase buildings that are efficient and help you gain more wealth. You also want to gain resources to use to build ships to gain food to feed your family. I like this game because it moves quickly and has the building aspect that I enjoy.







3. Trajan - In Trajan, you are trying to get the most points by gaining power in different areas of Roman culture. The turns are guided by a Mancala like mechanic. This is my favorite part of the game because you are limited to certain actions by the number of cubes you have in each bowl. I also like this game because it seems to have multiple ways to win. I enjoy trying different strategies.






2. Ginkopolis - In this game you add tiles to the edge of the city or to the existing city to give you points, resources, or more tiles. I like this game because I feel like I could always do better. Adam and I just played this for our best of 3 and I lost because of silly mistakes that I had made. I already look forward to playing this one again and hopefully this time I will win.






1. Agricola - Agricola is a farming game. You have your own individual farm and farmers that you use to take actions in hopes to make your own farm more successful than all of the other farms. I like this game because I get to build my own little farm and watch it grow. This is a game I feel as though I have gotten better at, but honestly still feel terrible at. I also like this game because it is so logical that I feel like anyone can understand how to play.





If you haven't played one of these games, you should definitely come over and play or find someone who owns them and play. It would totally be worth your time. 

May Mingle: Adam - Theology, Board Games, and Life

Adam is my final May Mingle guest. I met Adam in college and although I wasn't his biggest fan in the beginning, he obviously won me over because I said yes when he asked me to marry him. I love AND respect him and I am so grateful he did a guest blog for all of you.

You can find more from his blog here.

Theology, Board Games, and Life

When Krista asked me to do a guest blog, she wanted me to write about myself, but also write about my blog so others know what I normally write about. So what you are really going to get here is three blogs in one. Sorta like an example of the Trinity. BAM! Theology! So here is Theology, Board Games, and Life sneak peak on Joy in the Journey.

Theology

The most impactful philosophical decision you make is if you believe in absolute truth. You see this decision drives how you live your life, how you see your life, how you see the lives of others. I've been thinking a lot about this recently. With everything that is constantly in the news like homosexual marriages, abortion, Ukraine, wars or potential wars, slaughter in Sudan, human trafficking, legalizing marijuana, and a host of other topics.

Whether you see all these things as morally bad, just bad, or just fine or morally good is not what I want you to think about right now. What I want you to think about is WHY they are that. Why is human trafficking bad? Why is a homosexual relationship okay? The answer lies in what you think about absolute truth. You see if there is not an objective maker of truth, than your answer for what makes genocide wrong depends on who you ask. This means that the value of human life depends upon who you ask and what century you ask them in.

However, if we take the view of absolute truth then the answer is the same today for me as it is 200 years from now for you. The moral values do not change according to who wins a war, is in power currently in government, or makes the decisions in our world. You see, the problem with not adhering to absolute truth is that carrying the logic fully out it is okay to kill 2 year olds if you won’t want them or marry 12 year olds or subdue millions, just so long as it is culturally acceptable to do so.

So if we take this further, if truth is absolute, somehow it has to be made absolute by something outside human decision. That objective maker of truth, I believe, is Jesus Christ and he proclaims his unchanging nature and thus unchanging truth in Hebrews 13:8: Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever! This gets personal for me, because I then see that I’m not just some animal whose value wanes, that my kids and my wife, and those people I interact with on a regular basis have real value and don’t just have value because the current culture I live in say they do. This then challenges me to show their value to me.

Board Games

Whew! Writing about theology is taxing and thought provoking, which is probably why writing about board games happens more often on my blogs. It is just easier and less controversial and I have to worry less about saying the wrong thing. I’m going to stereotype right now and assume that most of the readers here are female and also mothers, since a lot of what Krista writes about has to do with those two demographics. So for board games, I’d like to say play them! Board games are such an excellent hobby to do with your family for many reasons, but I’ll try and break it down quickly.

1.       They are really quite cheap. I mean you can spend $40 on a cool hobby board game now, but compare that to going to a movie. If you take a family of four to a movie, then it is at least $32 (that is if you get $8 tickets) plus any refreshments you get for 2 hours of entertainment. With boarding though, you get to keep that entertainment and do it again and again and then you can even sell it later and recoup some of your money.

2.       It allows for family time without a screen. As a husband I really love it that my wife and my kids play games with me. We play them, have a great time (because they aren't the usual boring and non-thinking games of Monopoly and Life), while learning and stretching our minds.

3.       Not sure why I made this a list, but for number 3, I want to at least suggest some games to check out. Try out Takenoko, which is a game about a panda and a gardener.  Try out Ticket to Ride, which is a game about building trains across the USA. Try out King of Tokyo, which is a game about monsters attacking Tokyo. All of these are awesome games.

Life

There are a lot of things to write about life, but I think I don’t realize it until I write it. Most often when I post about life, it is about my family I've found or things we do together. I recently went to a convention for 4 days and that is when you realize what you miss in life, which is family. Just talking on FaceTime once a day isn't enough time to see them and only having the digital screen is not exactly cuddly. Life is the people you interact with whether going through tough times, missing them while you are away, or having a fun night playing board games or watching a movie. It was so great coming home from that convention, taking the next day off of work, and having the joy of my little girls run into the bedroom in the morning and climb up with kisses and hugs so excited to see me. That is life.

Oh. Yeah. I wanted to leave you with my favorite joke. What does a duck and tricycle have in common? They both have wheels…except for the duck!

May Mingle: Shannon - Peace and Rest

Shannon and I met at college. When I first started at Vennard, her room was right across from mine, but I didn't really get to know her until after she and I were both married and living off campus. Shannon is one of the sweetest people I know and I wish I could have gotten to know her better when we were in school together.

More from Shannon can be found here.

Peace and Rest

Hello Readers!! My name is Shannon and I've known Krista for over 10 years! We attended the same college, and even played a season of basketball together! Oh yes we did. We've both seen a lot of life happen in between!! I was so honored that she asked me to be a guest blogger! I honestly haven't blogged in forever…so it was nice to have an excuse to write again! With so many things on my mind lately I didn't know where to start…so I went with my gut and here's what I have to share with you all today!

Hard times…they fall on everyone. You can take a look at Facebook somedays and be overwhelmed by the amount of hardship that goes on in the lives of your friends…let alone the world. It's kind of been one of those seasons for us as well. Although I hate to complain,because everyone has their struggles…and quite frankly some are much worse than mine. 

However no matter what you are going through, these kinds of seasons wear you out, break you down and you start asking that question everyone wants to know… Why me, why now, WHY?! 

During another difficult season in my life, God really put that question in perspective for me. As I gazed out of my window last week, hands in dirty dish water, asking Why me? Why now? That same perspective came to me just as fresh as the day it was first whispered into my heart. No one wants to go through hard times…I mean we would all look at you as if you were crazy if you did! But in my experience there is nothing better at drawing you closer to God, than times when you are at your lowest,your weakest, your most vulnerable. Granted it's a process…in that time you might get angry, or even resentful toward God, I know I have. And honestly some of the best advice I ever received was if I was mad at God, to allow those feelings, go to Him with those feelings-to really let Him have it! Because quite frankly, He can handle it. That simple revelation that I could go to God, even with my anger opened up a whole new realm of our relationship. 

However with my hands in dirty dish water, kids screaming, me whispering "why" underneath my breath…I remembered W.H.Y. Let's rewind to 2006, I had just suffered a miscarriage of twins…and could have lost my own life in the process. I was physically broken, emotionally broken…and spiritually hungry for answers. A week after that painful day I was scheduled to give my Senior Chapel. At the college I attended with Krista, it was a requirement for graduation. I was one of those crazy ones that was looking forward to it since my freshman year! However I didn't realize it would fall on such a hard time in life. But in our weakness is where He shines…something I've come to learn in life. I had the option of postponing, but I felt that I needed to press on. In that week between, still in the first stages of grief, I kept thinking about why all of this happened… And then, it came to me, like a sweet little reminder that He's got it all under control…Wait on God, Hold on to His promises, and Yield to His will…W.H.Y. Sometimes we don't understand what in the world is going on. We can be in the midst of hardship, wondering how in the world did I get in this mess? We can be looking in the rearview mirror wondering what the heck was that all about? But one thing is for certain…He is in control. Sometimes we have to wait to see the purpose in whatever struggle that may be weighing us down today…but we always have His promises to hold on to. The promise Jesus gives- "you don't understand now what I am doing, but someday you will." (John 13:7) or the promise that " Weeping may endure for a night, But joy comes in the morning." (Psalm 30:5), or this one- "Then Jesus said, "Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light." (Matthew 11:28-30) There are so many promises…ones that hold joy, rest and peace. It's what faith is all about, and in that faith we must Yield. What we are going through may not make sense to us…but we have to have faith that His will is greater than what our eyes can see. We have to remember that He wants the best for us, that His love is all encompassing, soul fulfilling, and joy giving-even in the midst of struggle. 

When Krista asked me to be a guest blogger my brain was full of so many things I didn't know which way to go…but once again God whispered this into my heart. To me it's a familiar song, maybe it is for you too, or maybe it's something new that you never heard before…either way I don't know what is going on in your life dear reader…but I can almost say with certainty that at least one of you feels worn, weak and weary. And my hope and prayer is that what was whispered in my heart 8 years ago, last week and many times in between will speak to your heart as it did mine. That it will give you hope in times of trouble, and remind you that because He is risen, so can you be.

May Mingle:Randy - Making a Fresh Start ~ from Today

Today's May Mingle guest is my Daddy! I actually forgot that he even had a blog because it had been over a year since he had written anything. My Dad is a pretty smart guy and has lots of wisdom and I am grateful that he shares that wisdom with me and now with you.

You can check out my Dad's blog here.

Making a Fresh Start ~ from Today

It has been way to long since I’ve written in my Journey Journal.  Krista said she was going to have some guest bloggers and I hinted at letting me be one.  She laughed because it’s been a looooong time since I’ve blogged.  But, the challenge was out there and this is what I came up with as I journey down the road that God has laid before me.

As I look at this road, I’ve been distracted from my Guide – by “me.”  I’ve noticed more and more how selfish I am being.  I blame it on age or other things but when it comes right down to it – I’m just a selfish old buzzard!

In my griping and whining I was reminded of some things … so, here we go!

How many times have I said, “Man, would I like to have a fresh start in my Christian life?” I’ve made many mistakes in my life as a Christian. I’ve experienced many setbacks and failures throughout my life. Sometimes I allow these mistakes, these setbacks and failures to enslave me to the point that I never enjoy the full Christian life that God has given me to enjoy. 

In John 10:10 Jesus said, “I am come that you might have life and have it more abundantly.” Then he goes on to tell us that there is an opponent – a challenger – adversary – the enemy, called the devil that seeks to steal, kill and destroy that life. The devil will remind me of my past in order to keep me from enjoying the life that God gave me to live. The devil does not want me to have a fresh start in life. 

I’ve been dealing with this again lately.  Maybe it’s not just my past.  Maybe it’s a mixture of that and living under the circumstances instead of above them.

In dealing with – or possibly NOT dealing with this – I was reminded of something I had shared with a group of people in Appleton, Wisconsin back in 2013. This is what I was reminded of:

There is good news! God says, “I want you to have a fresh start in life, I want you to have a new beginning, I want to do something new in your life.” 

A cool verse from the writer of the book of Isaiah says “The Lord says, Forget about what has happened before. Do not think about the past. Instead, look at the new things I’m going to do.”

I hear, “Randy! Listen to what God is saying to you in this. Forget about what’s happened before. Don’t think about the past. It’s over. The book’s closed on it. – Move on, young man!  Look at the new things I’m going to do.” 

Israel no doubt was discouraged because they thought this was the end of them. They had gone to far, they had sinned and rebelled against God to the point that He would no longer be their God. Maybe they thought God would not deliver us again, it’s over. That is when they begin to remember the former things or past deliverances. Israel could remember past deliverances and past victories. They could remember when they were trapped by the Red Sea and had nowhere to go, how God made away for them. They could remember that when the enemy was about to overtake them how He provided protection for them. They could remember the former things, but they couldn’t see their future. That is why God said; “I am going to do something new."

I know there are others that feel like this too! You feel that you have made so many mistakes, you have failed God so many times and you have sinned it all away. Now God doesn’t want anything to do with you. 

You feel and believe that you have no future with God.

The good news is, God is saying, “It’s not over; I have plans for your life. I am about to do something new for you. ” 

So I want to write about the reminder from God that I got this week.  I’m calling it, “How To Make a Fresh Start!” 

It starts with this ‘formula.’  S.T.A.R.T. This is what helped me remember and so if I pass it along to friends, when you are being reminded of your failures, it may help you. Whether you had financial failure, or maybe a relational failure, a failure in your marriage, had a moral failure – You may have really blown it and you may have made some decisions you’re so ashamed of and hope nobody ever finds out about. Regardless of the failure you’ve had in your life, here’s how you start over.

S – Stop making excuses.

If I want a fresh start in life, I have to stop making excuses for my failures. I’ve got to stop blaming other people. I’ve got to stop seeing myself as the victim of my circumstances. 

Other people can hurt us, other people can harm us, and other people can scar us.  But the only person that can ruin your life is you.  Nobody can ruin your life without your permission. You have a choice and that is you can choose how you’re going to respond to those hurts. Solomon, in the book of Proverbs, says that the starting point is to just be honest and accept responsibility for my part in the problem. 

Solomon writes, “A man who refuses to admit his mistakes can never be successful. But if he confesses and forsakes them he gets another chance.” 

He gets a fresh start. He says the starting point to starting over is to be honest and face up to the problems, that most of the problems in my life, most of the failures, are my fault. 

It is hard for me many times to admit when I am wrong. People do not like to admit, “I mad a mistake, and I blew it.” God says that if we admit the mistake, if we admit our failures, and if we admit our sin, then we get another chance in life.

Solomon says, "A sensible man watches for problems and prepares to meet them but the fool never looks ahead and suffers the consequences."

He also says, "If you give up when troubles come, it just shows that you are weak."  Being a man, I don’t like being weak!

It’s always too soon to quit.  Solomon says we need to stop making excuses, admit when it’s our fault and get on with life. I’ve discovered that people who are very good at making excuses are rarely good at anything else. They spend all their energy thinking up reasons why they can’t do what they’re supposed to do. That describes me from time to time

So "S" in START stands for Stop making excuses.

T - Take an Inventory of My Life

I need to take an inventory of my life. That means I need to evaluate all my experiences. I need to look at what I have left after the failure. I need to take an inventory of my life’s experiences and learn from them. 

Paul, in his book to the folks in Galatia, wrote "You have experienced many things. Were all those experiences wasted? I hope not."

“Learn from your mistakes.” Failure can be my friend or my foe. I determine if failure will be my friend or foe by the way I react to it.

As I look at my life and the life of others, I’ve seen that there are four kinds of experiences that God uses to shape our lives. 

· He uses personal experiences. The family that you grew up in, the people you relate to. God can use your personal experience with your husband or your wife. He uses personal experiences to shape you.

· He uses vocational and educational experiences to shape you.

· He uses spiritual experiences to shape you, like coming to church, going on a retreat or reading your Bible, having a quiet time.

· He uses painful experiences to shape you.

As I take inventory of my life in starting over, I need to ask myself three questions. 

· What have I learned? If I don’t set down and think it through, I’ll end up repeating the same mistake over and over again because I didn’t learn from it the first time.

· What are my assets? What have I got going for me? Have I got my health? Have I got my freedom? Am I still mentally sound? (this seems to be questionable at times!)  :0) Have I got some friends? Have I got the Lord? Have I got a church family? What do I have that I can get a fresh start with?

· Who can help me? When we need a fresh start, we need somebody by our side – a friend, an accountability partner, a support person, or a support group. Find someone that can help you. You need other people because you don’t start over by yourself after a major setback or crisis. You need somebody else to walk along with you. There is one that we can count on to be there to help us to get a fresh start in life. The Lord Jesus will be there, He will help us to pull your lives back together and make sure that we get started on the right foot. 

A - Act in faith

This is the third step in getting a fresh start. Act in faith. I have to launch out into new territory. The writer of the book of Hebrews says that the key to changing anything is faith. If you want to change your circumstance, it takes faith. 

Jesus says this. “According to your faith it will be done to you.” That is a very simple statement but it’s very powerful. “According to your faith it will be done to you.” That means we tend to get out of life what we expect. “According to your faith it will be done to you." 

In order to start acting in faith, it means I’ve got to stop having a pity party. I’ve got to stop feeling sorry for myself.  “Poor me! I’m such a victim. Life is unfair.”  Of course life is unfair! Whoever said it was fair? God never said that. 

What I need to do is learn from those failures. In fact, I should maybe never call it a failure in my life. I should call it an education.

What I need to do is learn from the past, act in faith for the future and look to God for guidance. 

How do I get rid of fear of failure?  Faith! That’s why the third step in starting over is Act in Faith. Faith is not so much the absence of fear, as it is moving ahead in spite of my fear. Sometimes faith is doing the thing I fear the most. 

And I need to stop worrying about what others say or think. Solomon, again, says "Being afraid of people can get you into trouble.”  Another way of saying it is, “Fear of man is a dangerous trap, but to trust in God means safety. 

R - Refocus

I need to refocus my thoughts if I want to change my life. If I want to get going again, if I want a fresh start, I need to rethink the way that I think. I need to change my mind about a number of issues. 

Solomon, says "Be careful how you think. Your life is shaped by your thoughts." 

The way I think, determines the way I feel.  And the way I feel determines the way I act. If I want to change my actions, just change the way I think and it will inevitably change the way I act.  If I’m depressed, discouraged and distressed it may be because I’m thinking depressed, discouraged and distressing thoughts. That’s my choice. I don’t have to think those thoughts. If I’m acting in fearful, worried ways it’s because I’m thinking fearful, worried thoughts.

In a comedy routine with Bob Newhart, as a counselor, Bob would say to this, “Stop it!”

Paul, in his book, Romans, writes this, “Be transformed by the renewing of your mind.” 

If I have to refocus my thoughts to start over to get a fresh start, that means I have to stop thinking some old patterns. Which memories am I still rehearsing that keep me from having a fresh start in life?  The Bible says let go.  Let go of those things. The more I hold on to that memory, the more I rehearse it, it continues to hurt me today.  It cannot hurt me without my permission. I have to change my mind and let go and get rid of those painful, hurtful memories of shame and guilt and other things.

How do I do that? 

· First, confession. Some say and ask, "I’ve confessed to God but I still feel guilty. How do I get rid of a painful memory?"  Not by resisting it but by replacing it. Not saying, "I’m not going to think about it! I’m not going to think about it!" What am I doing the whole time? Thinking about it? Stop focusing on what I don’t want and start focusing on what I do want. Get my attention onto something else. Refocus. Replace those memories by, every time they come up, start thinking about something else. Focus on something else.

· What’s the best thing to focus on? God’s Word!

David wrote “Happy are those who are always meditating on God’s word. They’re like trees along a river that do not dry up. They succeed in everything they do. ” 

Those are the two things that everybody wants in life. We all want to be happy and we all want to succeed. The antidote, the answer, the way we get those is the phrase right in the middle “meditating on God’s word.”

That’s where the change takes place. That’s the power to start over.

And – here’s the last point in this formula of Making a Fresh Start …

T – Trust

Trust God to help us succeed.  Depend on Him. We don’t need depend on ourselves. We’ve already proven that we can’t do it on our own.  That’s why we’ve failed.  Some people just don’t get it.  They stumble and fall and then they get up and say, “I’ll just try harder!”  It’s like you go up to a wall and bang your head against it and the wall doesn’t fall down.  We try it again and Bang!  Again!  We keep doing it thinking, “Maybe it will fall over this time.”  That’s the definition of insanity – doing the same thing over and over and over and expecting different results.  If we keep doing the same thing then we will keep getting the same result.  We can’t change who we are, only God can do that. I am not talking about the outward man but the inner man.  The real person is the hidden person of the heart. Success in the Christian life is not trying harder, but living smarter – Giving God control of my life. 

Zechariah wrote, “You will not succeed by your own strength or power but by My Spirit, says the Lord.” 

“When someone becomes a Christian, they become a brand new person inside.  He is not the same anymore.  A new life has begun!” God specializes in new beginnings.  Jesus Christ has the power to do that.  It’s called being born again, the chance to start over.  We can have fresh start with a new life as we begin this journey forward today.  God says, “I don’t want you to turn over a new leaf.  I’m going to give you a whole new life.” 

So, as I finish this journey journal entry, I ask ~ Will you have a fresh start in life?  Will you have a new beginning?  It’s your choice.  How can you have a fresh start?  

For me ~ Will I have a fresh start in life?  Will I have a new beginning?  It’s my choice.  How can I have a fresh start?  I can have a fresh start by:

· Stop making excuse
· Taking an inventory of my life
· Acting in faith
· Refocusing my thoughts
· Trusting God

Thank you for hanging out with me on this journey!  Let me know, and I’ll pray with and for you.

Randy “JavaMan” Tooley

Isaiah 43.18

Proverbs 28.13

Proverbs 20.7

Proverbs 24.10

Galatians 3.4

Matthew 9

Proverbs 29.25

Proverbs 4.23

Romans 12.2

Psalm 1

Zechariah 4.6